A young woman with a baby was shown into the examining room. The doctor examined the baby and then asked the woman, "Is he breast fed or bottle fed?" "Breast fed," replied the woman. "Strip down to your waist," the doctor ordered. The woman did as she was told and the doctor examined her breasts. … Continue Reading →

A 54 year old accountant leaves a letter for his wife one Friday evening that reads: Dear Wife (that's what he called her): I am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I will be at the Grand Hotel with my beautiful and sexy 18 year old secretary. When he arrived at the … Continue Reading →

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."Customer "Ok."Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"Customer: "No."Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"Customer "No."Tech Support:: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and … Continue Reading →

A man said to his friends one night down the pub, "My elbow's really starting to hurt me. I'm going to see my doctor tomorrow." "Don't do that mate! There's this computer at the chemists that can diagnose anything faster than a doctor. Just put in a piss sample and it'll diagnose the problem and … Continue Reading →

A man went to church and saw his best friend crying there. "What happened? What could be so bad?" "My mother died yesterday," he sobbed. "Oh my God! Not Mrs. C. How did that happen?" "Well, it was hot yesterday, so we all had our beds on the balcony and we were sleeping. My mother … Continue Reading →

A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near-death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live." Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the … Continue Reading →